<body><script type="text/javascript"> function setAttributeOnload(object, attribute, val) { if(window.addEventListener) { window.addEventListener('load', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }, false); } else { window.attachEvent('onload', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }); } } </script> <div id="navbar-iframe-container"></div> <script type="text/javascript" src="https://apis.google.com/js/plusone.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript"> gapi.load("gapi.iframes:gapi.iframes.style.bubble", function() { if (gapi.iframes && gapi.iframes.getContext) { gapi.iframes.getContext().openChild({ url: 'https://www.blogger.com/navbar.g?targetBlogID\x3d11636542\x26blogName\x3dRandom+Things+I+Can\x27t+Tell+Regular+Pe...\x26publishMode\x3dPUBLISH_MODE_BLOGSPOT\x26navbarType\x3dSILVER\x26layoutType\x3dCLASSIC\x26searchRoot\x3dhttps://thewifeslife.blogspot.com/search\x26blogLocale\x3den_CA\x26v\x3d2\x26homepageUrl\x3dhttp://thewifeslife.blogspot.com/\x26vt\x3d-3224014002067203846', where: document.getElementById("navbar-iframe-container"), id: "navbar-iframe" }); } }); </script>

There are things that happen in life that I can't tell my friends and family about. However, a person can't keep everything inside!

Wife - daughter - employee - lover - writer - musician - sculpter - guilt hound - tea drinker - just another face in the crowd

View my complete profile

Claire in 30 seconds

March 23
April 02
June 11
July 24
August 11
November 01


March 2005
April 2005
May 2005
June 2005
July 2005
August 2005
September 2005
October 2005
November 2005
December 2005
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006


These are some interesting blogs I keep up on. I'll admit, I rarely comment, but there are some interesting people out there!
All About my Vagina
Myths and Metawhores
Catch Up 272
Unauthorized Bootlog
Fade to Numb
Goose and Gander
Dilemas of a Virgin Slut
Biting my Tongue
...I am Also a Sexual Being
Figleaf's Real Adult Sex
Post Secret(note, Post Secret isn't really a blog, but you should look it over anyway.)
Dingbat Fonts:
The Dingbatcave
Fine Art:
Powered by

ego booster


Random Things I Can't Tell Regular People

Tuesday, May 31

So, what did you do this weekend?

Random Monday morning banter, asking each other about our weekends: The weather was lovely, wasn't it? no we didn't do much, mostly just stayed in and took care of things around the home...

This is the part I didn't mention:
  • rousingly successful anal session
  • not going to church since we stayed up too late having sex
  • wearing my new skirt, and feeling mighty fine
  • doggy
  • girl on top
  • missionary
  • 69
  • sex while high
  • more bum fun
  • mind blowing pussy eating
  • wanton nudity
  • more orgasms than you can shake a stick at

Yeah, it was a pretty quiet weekend, really.
posted by claire ~ 9:58 p.m. | bullet.gif

Saturday, May 28

Why do I do this?

A brief note on why I bother blogging. Although, I've admitted in the past that I am a bit of an exhibistionist, that's not my main motivation. I like to tell my stories to understand them better in my brain. I do not write a blog to be the fodder for someone else's fantasy. If it so happens that people enjoy reading about the things I can't talk to regular people about, so be it, but it's not my prime objective. I write because I need to think things out in my head, and I do that best in writing. I also write for my husband, so he can see what I'm thinking. I'm not always very verbal, especially about things I find uncomfortable, embarassing, unusual, difficult... This blog lets me express myself in the way I feel most comfortable, instead of him trying to make me talk (like pulling teeth!). That's why I write.
posted by claire ~ 1:47 p.m. | bullet.gif

Friday night date

You may recall I briefly mentioned our Friday Night Ass Date the other day. Short story: it was a rousing success! Long story (and isn't that what blogging is about?) to follow.

I had thought about our date periodically throughout the day. With anticipation. I do like bum fun, I do have gigantic orgasms, but there was (is?) something wrong with my brain, preventing me from encouraging it. Yesterday though, was delightful. We hadn't done it in a while, and I was only letting myself think of the good parts of bum fun for the past couple days. We lay in bed, cuddling on our backs in delightful snuggleship at bedtime, waiting for someone to make the first move. He made some comment about "getting more comfortable," and I took the opportunity to lay on top of him. He started playing with my girly bits and I realised just how aroused I was - everything he did felt so good!

Then, he started playing with my rosebud, and the fun began. I didn't know it was anatomically possible, but he even went inside me in our girl-on-top position. I had such control, and I was totally relaxed, and it felt good. I would rub my clit against him, getting more and more aroused, wanting more and more of him inside me. It was such a sensation to feel so filled up, yet have my vagina free for fondling, and such easy access to my clit.

The rest is a bit of a blur... a couple other positions (always me on top), waves of wonderful feeling, a gigantic (and, I'm afraid, vocal) orgasm, and the deep desire to have my husband come inside me.

Why was last night's fun better than the other anal sex sessions we've had? This one was face-to-face; I felt much, much more connected to my husband, than just the act we were doing. I was on top and in control; I had no fear of him going too deep, or thrusting too much. I was in a comfortable position, and could therefore relax, having him inside me. I loved all the extra stimulation I got; my husband had full use of his two hands and he used them liberally!

All in all, it was a bum fun success. I have no bad feeling residue in my head, I am more willing to accept the fact that I do, in fact, like anal sex.
posted by claire ~ 12:35 p.m. | bullet.gif

Thursday, May 26

How does The Wife feel about skirts?

Image hosted by Photobucket.comI love 'em!

Living in Canada, skirts are too often paired with stockings (blech!). But when Spring rolls around, I'm out of my pants, and into something a little more me. My husband (wonderful as he is) bought me this beautiful skirt from the Gap. I don't normally shop there (about 75% of my clothing is Sally Ann or Value Village, so Gap stuff is a little above me) but this skirt was lovely. He saw it (or one similar) and thought he'd really like to see me in it. A few days later he bought me one!

I like skirts because they're feminine - and I need all the femininity I can get. They're comfy and never bunch at the crotch. They're cool in the summer and when the least little breeze comes by, my kootchie gets a reminder of how close it is to the outside world. The exhibitionist in me loves that!
posted by claire ~ 9:16 p.m. | bullet.gif

A lucky girl I am...

I was walking home this evening, pondering what all I could post tonight, and was having a hard time narrowing it down. The long and the short of it is that I have an amazing husband!! I came to this conclusion on the walk home, then I walked in the house to find the dishes all done and the house tidied. Wow.

So, here's what I was thinking about on the way home... Yesterday I was off work, due to an appointment I had to go to. I had a nice day, did some stuff, got groceries, but when I came home, I had a wicked headache. I get them (rarely) but they're nasty. Anyway, I was sick to my stomach, dehabilitated with this headache, and didn't enjoy the evening much. My husband was at work, but when he came home, he took such good care of me: taking care not to have too smelly of a supper (my tummy was still a little queasy), getting me a drink, making sure I was ok. When it was bedtime, he was convinced that a nice little bit of oral sex would do me good. It was given without strings. I lay on my back and he licked and touched and rubbed, it was amazing. Those rolling orgasms that come wave after wave... most delightful. Not once did he mention a cramp in his neck or a sore jaw from the position he was in (I know it's not your favourite, babe, but it was so nice last night!).

As I calmed down a bit, he lay there beside me touching himself. We discussed a few things (my period, (I guess I wasn't as over as I thought I was) and our Ass Date on Friday. Going to get back to enjoying anal fun! I'm actually looking forward to it.) and finally I put my hands between his legs, to touch him too. That was all he needed, his hands went around to hold on to me, and I gave him the best hand job I could do. It was just lovely to feel him, so strong around me, enjoying what I was doing for him. I didn't want him to come too quickly, since I was enjoying myself, and he was having a good time too. I'd switch things up a bit, but there was one thing I did, when I (laying on my side and he on his back) used one hand to go up and down quickly over the top of his penis, and use my other hand to squeeze the base, not moving there much at all. He loved it, and so did I (although I'll admit, my left arm is a little sore today from all the movement.) When he finally climaxed, I had my head right there to catch him all in my mouth. It was wonderful to feel him in my hands and be able to taste him too.

After that, we snuggled together for a good night's sleep. He was right, an orgasm does make a girl feel better.
posted by claire ~ 8:51 p.m. | bullet.gif

Monday, May 23

He said/She said

My coworker at the office today was discussing the loud sex noises coming from the neighbour's apartment, that prevented him from getting any sleep last night.

What I said was: Can you believe some people?
What I wanted to say was: Yeah, well my husband and I sleep on a matress on the floor because our lovemaking got too raucous for the bed frame.
posted by claire ~ 8:55 p.m. | bullet.gif

Friday, May 20

Dear husband,

I masterbated in the shower this morning. I very rarely do that - my personal time usually takes place on the bed with a vibrator. I'm not sure what posessed me this morning, I certainly didn't wake up thinking, today's the day I'm going to masterbate in the shower.

I started out by holding my lips open with my left hand, and touching my clit with my right. Direct hit. (Our hot water tank isn't so big and I wasn't wasting any time.) Wasn't long before I was desperate for something inside me. I actually glanced around the shower to see if anything would do, but quickly dismissed that idea. Left hand moved down and middle finger went in my pussy, pinky finger just slightly in my ass. Ahhhhh. That left my right hand to do the stimulating, pointer finger and ring finger worked together to give middle finger access to my pleasure spot.

You know me, I like my showers hot! By this time things were cooling off a little (at least the water was), but I wasn't too concerned. I turned around so the water was hitting my back and squatted down. The tub gave me excellent support with my knees and I could feel the water all around me. At this point, I was feeling the pre-inklings of climax, and I was ready! I noticed my pinky had slipped from slightly in my ass to significantly. Earlier I had been thinking about doing things in public, little exhibitionist that I am, but by now I was thinking about you. Watching me, kissing me, biting me all over...

Finally, I came. A real, fall-off-the-edge orgasm, complete with heavy breathing and little, tiny moans. I'll admit, not the best orgasm in the world (that distinction would have to go to March 28th, I think) but enought to get me through the day.

I hope you have a wonderful day, love. Think of me.
posted by claire ~ 9:37 a.m. | bullet.gif

Thursday, May 19

...and another thing I can't tell Regular People

Why I'm smiling when I wear these socks to work. They have no idea who I am at home...
posted by claire ~ 12:37 a.m. | bullet.gif

Tuesday, May 17

Quickie (and a small post)

This morning, I rolled over minutes before my alarm, and my husband whispered something about offering to do something for me to make my day a good one. It wasn't anything sexual he was offering, he has been concerned for me lately, since I've been a little blue. I can't remember exactly what he offered, but I knew what I wanted. There was a huge need between my legs - I wanted him! We're not always very good a quickies, our "sessions" tend to last quite a long time usually, but this morning, we only had 15 minutes, and I wanted to make them count, I was aching to have him inside me.

We went and brushed our teeth and leapt back into bed where I took his penis in my mouth right away. He always feels so good and he smelled heavenly. As soon as I could, I lubed up and got on top of him. Those times when he'd thrust his hips up as I moved down - he hit the exact spot I was aching for. I got on my hands and knees for a little bit, too - penetration is always deeper that way and that was exactly what I was looking for.

Neither one of us climaxed, and I was almost late for work, but it was totally worth it. Quickies definitely have their place.
posted by claire ~ 11:20 p.m. | bullet.gif

Saturday, May 14

Did I mention my husband is a light sleeper? Just as I hit "Publish," on the last post, here he comes into the living room asking me what I'm up for, since we'd agreed to stay in bed until noon. I explained I was on my way back to get him, that he should go back to bed. I snuggled into his open arms once back in the bedroom, and explained to him what I'd planned. He gave that little laugh that said, "ha. right." I asked him if I could and dived under the covers so only my bottom was showing. I took his penis in my mouth, just like I'd promised myself I would, and it was delightful. I do enjoy giving oral!!!

He had admitted he was sleepy, but I think he enjoyed it. It was so nice to give without strings - so often he does it for me! He was fairly silent throughout, so I kind of had to move on instict. I started slowly (since I knew his senses weren't fully functioning yet) and slowly slid my lips up and down. His breathing showed he had slid deeper into relaxation and I knew he was having a good time. I sped things up a bit, moving a little more quickly, applying a little more pressure with my tongue. I used my fingers like an O around his penis, and ran them up and down, wherever my mouth wasn't. Then, his cock started getting harder, and I knew that was a good sign. He gave little moans, and I knew that was an even better sign. Once those involuntary muscle twitches started I knew it was inevitable. He came deeply with a few strong thrusts, and he tasted delicious.

Maybe the so called Sex Drought was all in my head. I hope so.
posted by claire ~ 12:16 p.m. | bullet.gif

Sex Drought

It's happening again. I've fallen into a bit of a funk and fallen out of initiating (or reciprocating) anything sexual. I think it's been over a week since we've done anything and my prevading feeling is guilt at letting down my wifely obligations. We had a frank discussion the other night about anal sex (remember, my husband reads my blog, so he knew it was on my mind.) It was good to discuss it with him and try to work things out a bit. But a discussion is not a boinking and I'm feeling bad that my husband's not looked after.

I'm going to do some reading (unfurling, your story inspired me!) and then go in to the bedroom where my sleeping husband lies. I'm going to position myself so that I can take his penis in my mouth and wake him with lovely feelings. He's a light sleeper, so he'll awake before I get too far. I'll suggest he go back to sleep and gently enclose my mouth fully around his penis. It's morning, so he'll be semi-hard, but I'll be able to fit the whole thing in my mouth. I'll gently run my tongue over him, still with keeping my lips fully around his member. He'll grow longer, harder and I'll gently start moving my mouth up and down. It's warm this morning, so if the blankets are disturbed, my husband won't get cold. I may use my hands to cup his ball, all the while moving my mouth up and down (still slowly) his shaft. When his breath changes, I'll start going a little more quickly, flicking my tongue over the sensitive bit at the tip. He'll be relaxed, I'm certainly highly motivated, it won't be long until he comes. I'll swallow him up and let him sleep until noon, like we'd previously arranged.
posted by claire ~ 9:00 a.m. | bullet.gif

Wednesday, May 11

I felt pretty today.
posted by claire ~ 9:33 p.m. | bullet.gif

Monday, May 9


I have some issues with Anal Sex. I've admitted in the past that I do enjoy it, but my body and my brain are at odds on this one. I've been reading up on it (other's blogs, mainly), I think my problem in the beginning was that I didn't believe my husband could actually enjoy it. It's a dirty area, not associated with love/sex/comfort/pleasure. He's effectively convinced me that he enjoys it, finds it sexy and arousing and orgasm inducing. That's a big step because of all the connotations of "taking it up the arse" are really, really bad and demeaning and uncomfortable.

I'm not sure what my issue with it now is. There's no doubt that when I come with something in my ass, I come BIG. But, there's the point of beginning, when we're finding the right position, the right amount of penetration, the right amount of relaxation, that borders on painful. It's not that it hurts, so much as that it could hurt that scares me. I don't go in for that S&M stuff, really, and the thought of taking something so intimate and ruining it with pain is kind of scary. I feel vulnerable enough, let alone introducing physical discomfort as well as emotional...

I've cried after sex. The pleasure, the release, the closeness. It's a lovely feeling and I don't always know what to do with it so it manifests in tears. I have also cried after anal - sometimes because it hurt (my body and my mind), sometimes because it was just too much to handle. Sometimes I wish I could just throw caution to the wind and enjoy it as much as my husband does. I trust him, he loves me and he'd never hurt me, there's no reason to feel afraid or vulnerable. At the same time, I know that maybe the taboo is part of the appeal for him, which makes me hesitant to want it.

No real point to this post. Just dealing with some things, trying to decide what I feel. Last night I was hesitant to do the bum thing, but my husband wanted it, so I went along. Turns out I enjoyed it... I just wish I could enjoy it without all these issues.
posted by claire ~ 10:51 p.m. | bullet.gif

Take II

So, we tried the Butterfly Obsession again. This time I wore it at home for a bit first, just to get the hang of it. Placement is key, I've learned, and dishes are more fun with a vibrating clit. It makes me quite horny, although on it's own it doesn't make me climax. (For you more orgasmic ladies out there (Sue) it may do the trick, I'm not sure.) Anyway, I was twiddling around home, updating the family web page, reading some blogs, getting hotter and hotter as my husband would turn on and off the toy (but mainly on) and had the great idea to insert this toy as well. I thought it might just be enough to push me over the edge. Although delightful for a time, it took giving my husband oral (to which he happily complied when he learned about the state of my behind) and pushing the toy right up against me to actually come. By this time, I had been wearing it for quite some time, so it was such a relief when I finally came! I nearly swallowed all of my darling husband's penis!

Then, we went to the movies.

I was wearing panties this time, and snugger fitting pants, so it stayed in place much better. Again, it didn't make me come (although, an orgasm at the theatre would have been so cool) but I was really, really close there towards the end of the movie. Two things of interest here: 1) our movie theatre has set up cameras in the ceiling tiles of the auditorium. For those of you thinking of fooling around in the back row, look up first - there may be some security guard perv watching you. Our local security guard perv (if even watching) would only have seen me squirming in my seat and clutching my husband's hand/leg/arm. 2) In quiet moments, the toy can be loud. I read it likened to a lawn mower on one reviews site. If there is any background noise, it's indescernible, but when a theatre is silent, it sounds like a pager vibrator.

Now, this post is getting a little long, and the day is getting on. Suffice it to say, the night ended with one satisfied horny wife, laying on the bed moaning that she's going to die of pleasure, having just had a gargantuan orgasm, with her husband's juice oozing out her ass. He, spent on the bed beside her, pleased at a night of sucessful bum fun.
posted by claire ~ 9:28 a.m. | bullet.gif

Shaven Pussy Update

I know you're all waiting with bated breath: what is the state of The Wife's shaven pussy? Not so hot, I'm afraid. It was a fun experiment, lasted all of a week (if that, even) before I gave up the upkeep. Now, if my husband had a 40 minute bath with me daily, to keep my pussy in tip-top shape, then I'd go for it. As it is, I can't reach enough places and bristles do not make me feel sexy. A good try, I'd say.
posted by claire ~ 9:25 a.m. | bullet.gif

Sunday, May 8

Take II

Remember my new toy? Right, we're trying at again. At the movies. I'm wearing panties. I think it'll work just fine. Keep you posted.
posted by claire ~ 7:42 p.m. | bullet.gif

Saturday, May 7

Brushing up on vocab (not for scrabble)

As fun as it is to write about our sexcapades, I have a severe lack in my vocabulary. Here are some words people use that I would also like to use: cunt, slit, snatch, twat, kootch (we do use this one), pussy (my personal fav), mound, clit, button, blow job, ass, cock.

I think I need some more (although, I did get a little wet compliling this list...)
posted by claire ~ 9:41 p.m. | bullet.gif

Wednesday, May 4

Freshly shaven

My husband and I had quite a time in the tub last night. We had discussed recently about shaving my pubic hair and last night was the night to do it. I was a little tired after my day at work, my husband was a little randy... what better than a soak in the tub and him working studiously at my crotch? I've tried this before with, well, not-so-hot results. It was painful and itchy and I got little red bumps that weren't all that attractive - no to mention I felt like a little girl and not the sexy woman I want to be. But last night was a success!

I suppose my husband wields a razor better than I, because this time I had virtually no stinging and this morning, no red bumps. I could see his admiration, which was a nice turn on, and made it feel much more erotic. It lead (inevitably) to the bedroom where I got oral, which my husband said was delicious.

- easy access, baby!
- something new, something fun
- shaving cream feels divine
- seeing my own pussy, and having it seen
- easy access
- another "together" activity (where he stares long and hard between my legs)
- did I mention the easy access?

- stubble
- potential for razor burn
- feelings of vulnerability

I think I'm going to try and upkeep it for a while. Housewyfe, I think I read that you shave, don't you? Any hints? Anyone else out there with some suggestions?
posted by claire ~ 9:16 a.m. | bullet.gif

Tuesday, May 3

A new toy

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
So, we went out Sunday night, Just to look. Here's what we came home with, the Butterfly Obsession.

We had had lovely sex earlier in the afternoon, I was still feeling kind of randy, I left the house without any panties. We went to the local toy store and they had a surprising array of wireless, remote control vibrators. This was the one we had looked the most at online (I like the look of the little penis there) and the price was right.

Once we had our purchase in the discreet, dark blue, plastic bag, we went to the local Tim Horton's (coffee shop) to try it out. It took some adjustment, but I got it attached and, after a second trip to the loo, got the batteries properly inserted. Handed over the control and awaited the pleasure. It was kind of fun since no one new that I was vibrating. (I'll admit, I did jump a little when my husband turned it on the first time!)

Anyway, it was undeniably enjoyable. Virtually silent (the only time we heard it was walking up the stairwell in our apartment). I didn't come, but it was really nice none the less. Next time, I'm going to snug it up with panties and tight jeans... then we'll be buzzing to paradise! Stay tuned...
posted by claire ~ 8:57 a.m. | bullet.gif

Graphics and design by Ann Stretton ©2001