Sunday, December 25
And so this is Christmas
This is it. This is Christmas day. All the fluff and feathers, the purchases, the mailing, the carols, it's all about this.
I must admit, it's a little anti-climactic.
I know the real meaning of Christmas. I'm a bible believing Christian and I went to the service last night, I know that this is a day to celebrate God's coming to humanity. The trouble is, traditionally, one is to celebrate this day with friends and family. Alternately, one is to celebrate this day with obscene amounts of gifts. Right?
Well, my husband and I are on our own. I'm not about to bake a turkey for two - I don't even think I could bake a turkey. We chose the frugal Christmas and didn't really do gifts or stockings. Gifts from family were mainly cheques, and those were opened (and cashed) when they came in the mail.
Re-reading this, I think it sounds a little whiny. I'm not whining and I'm not even really all that sad. I miss my family, yes. But honestly, I don't really think being there this holiday would have solved this connundrum. I'm just thinking this through, trying to put my finger on my malaise. If my darling husband reads this (and I know he will, Hi babe!) he's going to ask what we can do to make things better. Let me consider a moment.
I think I've got it. Growing up, Christmas was all about traditions. We'd go to the Christmas Eve service, come home and visit and open one gift each. We'd wake up Christmas morning, have an orange (to settle our stomachs before all the chocolate was opened :) We'd read the Christmas story in Luke and pray. We'd open stockings and gifts one by one. Then we'd get ready for the day and go Grandma's. We'd meet with all the cousins and have egg mcmuffins (home made, of course) and open a few more gifts. It'd be chaos there and we'd be ready to get back to our quiet house for the afternoon. Then we'd go to my other grandparents' and, depending on the year, open gifts or have a big turkey dinner. It was a busy day and there was a definite routine to it.
Now that I'm on my own with my husband, we don't have too many traditions. For the past couple years, we've stayed up really late and mostly slept through Christmas. We went to a movie Christmas day last year. I wonder if I'm feeling like I've lost a number of traditions, and haven't yet made any new ones to take their place. I couldn't help but put some expectations on the day. That was probably my first error.
Remember, I'm not especially melancholy. I'm not sad and I'm not frustrated, disappointed, discontented or let down. However, I think that next year when my husband and I do Christmas, I'd like to actually do Christmas. Open some gifts Christmas morning, make stockings for each other, put up a tree, lights.
But that's next year. Today is Christmas. I have a loving husband in the room with me now. I have parents just a phone call away. I have a nice cup of tea on my desk, awaiting my attention. I'm going to sign off, Christmas won't be here forever!
posted by claire ~ 3:36 p.m. |